Sunday, June 7, 2015

What we learned: Game of Thrones: 5.8 HardHome

1. ALOT about the White Walkers - Including they have Swagger!
The White Walkers have been mostly a teach in Game of Thrones - we have had 3 on screen appearances, and all of them brief. This was the first time we really get to see them in action.
First, we learned fire has no affect on them. The first Walker that appeared to fight the Wildling Then and Jon Snow in the barn - as he enters the bar, the flames around him. Next, not only does Dragonglass kill them, but so does Valyrian Steel. We have only seen a handful of Valyrian steel swords (Longclaw [Jon Snow], Oathkeeper [Brienne], the dagger used in the attempt on Bran Stark's life and Widow's Wail [Tommen] are the only Valyrian steel swords that have appeared in the show. Let's hope the Brothers of the Night's watch didn't lose all their dragon glass in the Battle at Hardhome - or that Stannis has some glass being delivered form Dragonstone.
Second - who know the Walkers were show offs?


2. Cersi's latest power grab was her undoing.
I mean honestly - what would someone with as many skeletons in her closet give power to religious fanatics? As the wise philosopher 50 Cent once said, "don't throw stones when you live in a glass house." What did she think Lancel was going to do after he got his head tattoo, continue lying to protect her? Cersi was put in her place by a few too many people in the last two seasons, and in an effort to stay on top, she has people in jail, her son wasting away in his room crying to Ser Pounce, and her entire house about to crumble.

3. Jorah Mormont is on a suicide mission.
Many people have said he has gone crazy. While close, he has been banished from his homeland, then was banished from his true love. He thought he had a way to get back into her good graces, but for all his efforts he was infected with Greyscale and sent packing AGAIN. Considering we've only seen one character in the show who has survived Greyscale, Jorah knows he will be dying soon, so he is going to do whatever he can for the Mother of Dragons - even if that means just killing slaves in the fighting pits, he wants to die fighting for his queen.

4. Slavery is still alive and well in Slaver's Bay
OK, I'm cheating a little bit here using details from "The Gift", but for someone who thinks she has ended slavery, she isn't doing a great job. Jorah and Tyrion were enslaved, bought and sold, and forced to fight in the pits. When Tyrion suggested they fight as free men, the master gave him a quick punch in the jaw, flipped him a coin, and said that those wages would last the rest of his life. The Masters have found a loophole to exploit; When Daenerys allowed slaves to sell them back to their masters for a period of no more than one year, she gave them all they needed to keep slavery alive and well. And not every slave is as well educated as Tyrion.

More Questions than Answers:
1. How many Wildlings did Jon bring back? I have re-watched last week's episode many times, and it appears most of the Wildlings were on the WRONG side of the wall when the army of the dead attacked - meaning the Walkers MIGHT have the largest army in the world.  
2. Will Stannis realize the most important battle lies to the North and not in Winterfell? 
3. Will episode 9 have the surprises we've come to expect from GoT, or did they give us that an episode early this season? 


GoT Warrior Power Rankings


1. Jon Snow: Once a whiny little "lord" he has gone full bad ass, punishing the mutineers, defeating the wildlings, recruiting them, and then killing a White Walker. Sure, Sam killed one, on accident - Jon stared one in the eye and took it down. I can't think of anyone with a better kill on their resume. I would mark him down for being such a clean, pretty fighter, he has proved himself time and time again.


2. Brienne of Tarth: This might seem a little high, but that is mainly because we have seen some great fighters go down lately, one of which was taken down by Brienne: The Hound. Brienne has also been seen defeating Loras Tyrell in combat, and easily dispatching a chained, malnurished Jaime Lannister. She waits and watches for a signal from Sansa, and I am sure everyone in the Thrones community would liek to see her cut through Roose Bolton's men. 

3. Tormund Giantsbane: We've seen him cut down over a dozen men of the Night's Watch, and do the same to the army of the dead. 

4. Jorah Mormont: While it has been awhile, Jorah has reminded us this season he is a bad ass. He killed a handfull of Stone Men while protecting Tyrion in Old Valyria, he made quick work of slaves in the fighting pits, but we've also been reminded he took down on of Kal Drogo's blood-riders with relative ease while protecting Daenerys. He may be long in the tooth, but he continues to prove to be one of the best fighters in the show. 

5. Wun Wun: He's a fucking Giant. He was crushing the army of the dead like ants. Unfortunately, I think the White Walkers can turn him into shattered ice just like everyone else.

6. Ser Bronn of the Blackwater: Bronn carried Jaime on his back on their trip to Dorne - he took on all four Dornish guards, leaving Jaime one injured one to deal with while he killed the other three single-handed. While he is currently stuck in a cell, his voice is so pretty it makes HBO decide to give us some of that sweet, sweet gratuitous nudity! Rawwr, Sandsnakes!

7. Jaqen H’ghar: Though we don't know if this is the same man who helped Arya and her friends escape the Lannisters, we know one thing: he knows how to kill. So much so, he teaches a class.  

8. Daario Naharis: He is a tougher nut to crack. Most of his fighting has been done in the shadows. He remains a dangerous man, but we haven't seen him battle any great warriors - yet. Although he did take down Mereen's champion with a single blow, and led the secret invasion of Yunkai. 

9. Grey Worm: Currently laying in bed recovering from an ambush, only alive because of the heroic effort of Barriston Selmy, he becomes the best fighters in Daenerys corner.  

10. Jaime Lannister: It's a shame we didn't get to see more of him in his prime. We saw him battle Ned Stark in the streets of King's Landing, but that was basically a draw until one of his men injured Ned and ruined the fight. Since he lost his hand, he has been a shell of his former self - barely able to beat an injured guard from Dorne. He had his HAND full (see what I did there?) with the Sand Snakes, he should probably learn from his younger brother and stick to politics. But he is getting better - perhaps he will learn to use his golden hand as a weapon as opposed to a handicap. 

11. Loras Tyrell: We've heard tales of the Knight of Flowers being a great warrior - but he appears to be more of tournament fighter than one in real life. He was defeated by Brienne in season 2, and barely put up a fight when he was arrested by the Faith. But for now, he sits in a cell, likely waiting his fate to be decided by trial. 


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